If you’re interested in getting your boyfriend to move in with you, here are some ideas you can try, although let me remind you of the caveat that you can’t make your boyfriend do anything unless he decides to do it —granted that he’s Mr. Right instead of Mr. Right now.
So attraction works better than trying to convince him yourself. If he likes you and you’re a fun, interesting person to be around, so much the better. Remember to keep having fun in your own life – trying new experiences and adventures often. If you’re attractive to him, sooner or later he will decide he wants to move in with you. And it’s always better if he thinks it was his idea, rather than you urging him to do it.
Moving is a big deal and takes a lot of effort, so first be sure you’re ready for it! Do you really want to share your space with someone else, another human being? How important is your privacy to you, because I can guarantee you’re going to have a lot less of it. Years ago I let my boyfriend move into a loft I lived in and that didn’t work out great. A loft is essentially one giant room, and the only place either of us could be alone was in the tiny bathroom!
Also, do you want someone else seeing all your dirty laundry – literally and figuratively? Any weird or funky habits you have will become much more obvious to your boyfriend if he moves in. Make sure there’s nothing left over from old boyfriends or other memorabilia you want to clear out before taking this big step.
So make sure you’re ready, and be honest with yourself. Moving in together can be a fantastic, fun adventure, but there will always be some bumps along the way. [RELATED: Why Won’t My Boyfriend Propose ]
Start out with small steps. If your boyfriend’s never spent the night at your place, then it’s way too early to be thinking about moving in! But I assume he’s stayed over plenty of times, or you wouldn’t be considering this move.
Little gestures can carry a message – buy him a toothbrush and a towel to use at your place. That will slowly start to make your place seem like a place he lives, rather than one where he sometimes sleeps over.
Do some fun things at home like cooking together, or hosting a game night for your friends. If you both host a party at your place, he’s bound to feel some sort of ownership of the place.
Ask his advice on redecorating or let him help fix up the place if it needs minor repairs or other work.
Next, give him someplace to put his keys, wallet, phone and other stuff when he comes over. A little drawer in your dresser is perfect, or maybe some sort of bowl on top of the bedside table. How big is your bed, by the way? Big enough for two? I hope so! Otherwise you need to do some furniture shopping soon.
If things are still going well, give your boyfriend a key and let him use it. When the two of you come to your door together, let him unlock it and open it. This is another small gesture that can carry a lot of meaning.
Language is also important. If you intend this place to someday be home for both of you, start calling it “home.” Don’t say, “Take me home,” because that means your home, not his. Say things like, “Let’s go home.” At the end of a date or an evening together, nothing will warm his heart like hearing you say that. “Let’s go home.”
Once you’ve done these kinds of things, you’ve laid the groundwork. The last thing to do is be honest and ask him to move in. Suggest the practicality of it – saving on rent, etc. – but also let him know you enjoy being with him and want to live together. Guys have feelings, too, and they want to be wanted just as much as you do.
Best of luck!